You Always Have Choices

We all find ourselves in troubling situations occasionally. Bad job, bad marriage, conflict with someone. And we often feel that there is no way out. We're trapped!

However, there are always four choices or options available to us:

1. Change the situation 
2. Change your feelings about the situation 
3. Leave
4. Stay in the situation and continue being upset by it

By all means the first choice is the most desirable in most cases. Do something to change the situation so you are no longer stressed by it. This could mean going to a marriage counselor, talking with your boss about your job, or resolving the conflict. 

The second choice is sometimes possible. You simply decide to quit reacting to the situation. If you can do this, the problem is solved. Be careful, though, that you aren't deceiving yourself. The situation is still bothering you but you're telling yourself it is not. This will blow up eventually. 

Sometimes the only solution is to leave the situation. Divorce or quitting your job will be painful but in the long run it is better than constant suffering. Just find a way to do it that minimizes additional pain for everyone involved. 

Finally, you can remain in the situation and continue being upset, but the time should be minimized. Staying in a bad situation will take its toll on you eventually. Stress causes health problems if endured for a long time.

What is important is to realize that you always have choices, you just don't want to take them, which is also a choice.

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